For the purposes of today’s lesson we will be looking at the Reasons for relationship and marriage failure because implementing on this will go a long way in trimming divorce rate
Often times we see married people seeking for divorce,
sometimes the marriage might not even last up to a year.
However this is kinda sad and not encouraging.
Sometimes you may ask what could be the reason why some new relationship
vanish away like smoke”?
…….What actually went Wrong?
well this is the exact same question which many people around the globe ask
even the divorcees them
I remember a marriage that only lasted for just 5 months.
and the couple were seriously seeking for divorce due to the fact that both parties couldn’t tolerate each other.
even so the man said to his wife I course the day I fined you.
wife: I regret ever getting married to you.
However Divorce rate is highly degenerative even on daily bases
When Relationships/Marriages fail, Who are we supposed to blamed ?
is it the husband (man) or the wife. (woman)?
Here are few Reasons why Relationships/Marriage are failing today…
Reasons for marriage/relationship failure. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_views_on_marriage?wprov=sfla1
1. FAULTY FOUNDATION
One of the reasons why
Many Relationships/Marriages are breaking down today is because they were not on a solid foundation, rather they were built on an ordinary surface and a little wind (little quarrel) can bring them down.
Some relationships are built in a very wrong way.
And when you build a relationship with a wrong motive it will definitely full
Take for example:
I: Lost of flesh
When you get carried away by her curves,and figures, the way she walks, His body physiques,
His romantic tune,
the enthusiastic way which he handles you
she is good behind closed doors, for whatever reason I don’t even understand, knowing fully well that premarital sex is a sin.
you then assume that is a good reason enough for you marry him?/her? In the hope that sex would see you guys through? Anyway let me tell you this bitter truth no matter your ability in love making, the bitter truth remains that sex can’t, won’t and can never keep your Marriage. This is one of the Reasons for marriage failure and increase in divorce rate
Although there are people who have mastered the act but that’s just a pleasure for the moment.
in other words sex is not love.
Good sex cannot keep or retain a spoiled
Think about her character
Think about,his level of Maturity
His love for God, is he a God fearing type
what about his temperament are you a type that can handle hot temper?, can she Cook?
is she a wife material
these are some of the questions you should ask yourself
Don’t just go into a relationship ship because of what lies in between your legs
and secondly if you are not ready for marriage don’t date otherwise you’re dating for fun sake
ii: Love for Money
His is a business man,
He works in an oil company, he owns his own house,
so many ladies fall into this trap even guys too,
the desperation for a good life (which isn’t bad itself), has made many turn blind eyes and deaf ears to wise counsel,
you should try and understand that Money is just an aspect of a good Relationship/Marriage,
A man Can have money and at the same time be stingy,
You shouldn’t marry someone all because his/her achievements because money has wings and can fly at any time
don’t go into relationship because you think there is money, fame, properties to be gained by so doing,
Beautiful skin will fade, money may come and go,But true love and character will definitely stay..
iii wrong methods
then again this is another bad pattern of marriage that has triggered divorce rate so badly.
-Using pregnancy to trap a Man
-Blackmailing someone into Marriage
-Stealing( in other words snatching) somebody’s Spouse and so on
this kind of relationship always end in tears.
However you can’t destroy other people’s Relationships and expect yours to be great or last.
never Karma is always at work here
it’s immaturity that will make a Man do nothing while his Mother/siblings overthrows and oust his wife in her own matrimonial home.
This is one of the strong Reasons for relationship and marriage failure
When you focus on getting into Relationships rather than implementing on becoming individual with capacity and strength required to withstand the stress of being in a Relationship such people do face the consequence, However
Many People are preparing for wedding while , few are delighted preparing for MARRIAGE.
When people who are not ready financially,
emotionally get Married, they starts having one problems or the other
“I am in my thirties”
“All my Mates are Married”
Hear me out, Marriage is not a Function of attaining a certain AGE, but of attaining a certain STAGE in Life.. which is MATURITY.
Relationships and Marriage is not for Babies, or for Mummy’s Boys and Daddy’s Girls
Do well to Read your Bible,
“and a MAN shall leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his WIFE”
Things you should do before marriage
a) Self discovery
b) Self control: infidelity,is as a result of a lack of self control and spiritual immaturity
c) You should have the ability to feed two or more mouths
d) Be sure to make self decisions not depending other people
e)Be ready to learn unlearn and relearn
f) Have you own apartment
However am not going to elaborate that much on this features but you can get the full details here
further more Have the ability to detect when your spouse is either Happy or sad because there are some certain things they might not say, if you can abide with this tips divorce rate will reduce and your marriage will never experience failure
Beauty, Intelligence, Charisma, Dress sense, these are great attributes that spice up and bring fourth initial attraction, in any relationship/marriage
They put spark and shine into a Relationship but they are never enough to sustain a Relationship or Marriage on their own.
Good character remains ones of the best tool for a successful marriage, it can help to reduce Reasons for relationship and marriage failure
Elaborating on this will include
Manner of Approach
There are some people who don’t have manner of approach
as a husband or as a wife you should know best the way to approach your spouse. because 87% of domestic violence are as a result of wrong approach. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-control?wprov=sfla1
You should know that the manner in which you approach some cases determine the velocity
As a wife you shouldn’t nag over every little thing.
Don’t be a quarrelsome wife even the Bible said in (proverbs,21:19)
it’s better to live alone in the desert than with a quarrelsome wife.
let’s try to embrace good character above all other qualities because if our marriage/relationship should lack this attribute it will be kinda difficult to embrace peace in our relationships/marriage
And above all pray to God to guide and direct you.
regardless of your intellectual capacity.
On the other hand , father can give their sons an inheritance of houses and wealth but only The Lord can give an understanding wife
4)NO BODIES FAULT:
At times you try your possible best and end up to no avail,
You do all you can and still yet nothing to show for it,
then quit, (in relationship not for marriage)
Truth be told, some things were not meant to be. God knows why .
Many divorce cases and Relationship break ups are likely to full in this categories
1=> Unpleasant Attitude
To be perfectly honest,
you can actually reboot yourself in this aspect so try to do better.
Build your relationship with trust and honesty so as to avoid feature disaster
- maturity is not by age or size it’s all about what you have up stairs
ask God for knowledge and wisdom
I Pray that God will give your more and more knowledge and insight regarding this. that you may have a joyful marriage. And help us trimme divorce rate.
Wish you more wedding and wedding anniversaries
in jesus name Amen